Slumps

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Ever been in a slump? I’ve been stuck in one for a while. Really it’s been two slumps—sleeping too much and rudderless running.

The rudderless running isn’t too bad since I don’t need to start a real training plan until February, but I’m still running less than I want to. Part of it has been a time thing, but part of it has been a lack of motivation. 

The sleep thing has been more of a bother. Since.I made a medication change last July, sleeping too much has been a problem. If I let myself, I’ll sleep 10+ hours a night.

I should be able to get past my sleep slump. Once I’m awake for an hour or so on the days when I do force myself out of bed, I usually feel fine. Still, it’s so easy to hit snooze and sleep as late as I possibly can to get to work on time.

I’m hoping that a visit to the nurse practioner that manages my medications will mean I can reduce the dose of one of my drugs. I think that’ll make a difference and make it easier to get up in the morning.

As for running, I’m going to set myself up a training schedule, even though I’m not training for anything in particular. I don’t do great running just for running’s sake, so setting a goal of being as fit as possible to run with the track athletes I help coach in the spring would be a good start.

What do you do when you experience a slump? What gets you out if it? I’d love to hear from you.

Improving Mental Health: Heaven's Reward Fallacy

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

One common cognitive distortion that everyone succumbs to from time to time is the Heaven's Reward Fallacy. The PositivePsychologyProgram website writes the following about the Heaven's Reward Fallacy:

This distortion is a popular one, particularly with the myriad examples of this fallacy playing out on big and small screens across the world. The “Heaven’s Reward Fallacy” manifests as a belief that one’s struggles, one’s suffering, and one’s hard work will result in a just reward. It is obvious why this type of thinking is a distortion – how many examples can you think of, just within the realm of your personal acquaintances, where hard work and sacrifice did not pay off? Sometimes no matter how hard we work or how much we sacrifice, we will not achieve what we hope to achieve. To think otherwise is a potentially damaging pattern of thought that can result in disappointment, frustration, anger, and even depression when the awaited reward does not materialize.

It's easy at times to feel like we're not getting what we deserve. Why didn't I get that promotion at work when I worked so hard? Why doesn't this person want to date me when I've worked so hard at being his friend?

The best way I can think of in combating this cognitive distortion is to simply take things as they come. Realize that sometimes people get what they deserve and sometimes they do not. Realize that your hard work and sacrifices may not result in a reward. Don't see yourself as "deserving" something, but instead appreciate the positive things that come your way, and don't feel resentful when you feel like you're not getting rewarded in the way you feel you deserve.

This is the last of my series on cognitive distortions. If you're interested in reading the entire series, you can do so by going to the following link: Cognitive Distortions.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health: Always Being Right

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

A common cognitive distortion is Always Being Right. The PositivePsychologyProgram website says the following about Always Being Right:

Perfectionists and those struggling with Imposter Syndrome will recognize this distortion – it is the belief that we must always be right, correct, or accurate. With this distortion, the idea that we could be wrong is absolutely unacceptable, and we will fight to the metaphorical death to prove that we are right. For example, the internet commenters who spend hours arguing with each other over an opinion or political issue far beyond the point where reasonable individuals would conclude that they should “agree to disagree” are engaging in the “Always Being Right” distortion. To them, it is not simply a matter of a difference of opinion, it is an intellectual battle that must be won at all costs.

This cognitive distortion affects my mental health indirectly. I rarely engage in political discussions on social media for a couple reasons. First, my Facebook friends generally fall into two categories: those I agree with politically and those I don't. I don't see a lot of in between, so any political discussion I get into is either argumentative or falls into an echo chamber, and when there's so little chance anyone's mind is going to be changed, it's just not worth it. Secondly, it just makes me anxious. I generally don't like getting into arguments with friends and family, and in that regard it doesn't really matter who's right.

So, spending time trying to prove I'm right is neither productive nor good for my mental health. Also, it's healthy to look at one's own opinions and beliefs and not be afraid to change them when there is information to the contrary.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health: Personalization

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

The PositivePsychologyProgram website describes the Personalization distortion as:

taking everything personally or assigning blame to yourself for no logical reason to believe you are to blame. This distortion covers a wide range of situations, from assuming you are the reason a friend did not enjoy the girl’s night out because of you, to the more severe examples of believing that you are the cause for every instance of moodiness or irritation in those around you.

I see this one most commonly in relationships. How often have you found yourself asking someone, or thinking, "Are you mad at me?" I think it's not at all unusual to deal with Personalization, especially if you have past experiences where you were blamed for things that were not your fault.

Like many of the other cognitive distortions, Personalization can be attacked with facts. Rather than assign yourself blame for every negative situation that arises, find other reasons why someone's behavior is negative that don't involve your.

Unresolved conflict can also be a reason for Personalization. Rather than let conflict fester and assign yourself all the blame for a disagreement, find positive ways for resolving that conflict. A good resource for resolving conflict can be found at the Huffington Post Life Blog, "10 Tips for Resolving Conflict." A key quote for this article: "If handled effectively, conflict can be an opportunity for learning, growth and positive change."

Don't let Personalization control your relationships and self-esteem. Believing you are always at fault will lead to depression and anxiety about your relationships. Take control and instead find ways to depersonalize and empower yourself.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health - Should Statements

This post is the first in a series of cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) are two types of therapies I’ve used that have helped me improve my mental health. In this post I’ll focus on one of the DBT “swear words,”which is also a cognitive distortion in CBT. DBT identifies “swear words” that get us stuck in our thinking. Removing and/or replacing these words and thought patterns can improve our mental health and problem solving skills. This post will focus on "should" and "shouldn't" statements.

The PositivePsychologyProgram website describes Should Statements as:

statements that you make to yourself about what you “should” do, what you “ought” to do, or what you “must” do. They can also be applied to others, imposing a set of expectations that will likely not be met. When we hang on too tightly to our “should” statements about ourselves, the result is often guilt that we cannot live up to them. When he cling to our “should” statements about others, we are generally disappointed by the failure of the others to meet our expectations, leading to anger and resentment.

Some of this information is adapted from a packet I received in a DBT skills group. The packet is based on, “The Feeling Good Handbook,” by David Burns, and, “Skills Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality Disorder,” by Marsha Linehan.

Of the ten cognitive distortions identified by David Burns along with others that have been added, identifying and changing "should" statements has been one of the most helpful to me when I’m feeling manic and especially when I’m feeling depressed or anxious.

Should statements when I’m manic are a problem because my mind races, and I tell myself I should be doing many things. Then, instead of completing a task, I flit from thing to thing rather than focusing on one task at a time.

It’s become a major help to me to change my “should” into, “I’d like to,” and, “I choose.” When I  do this, I’m more able to make a list and prioritize what I’d like to do. Then, instead of saying to myself, “I should vacuum the cars, deep clean the kitchen, go for a run, write three blog posts, and clean the bathroom," I can re-frame my thinking and be more realistic by deciding what I want to do first and then tell myself, “I choose to do this task.”

Eliminating should statements when I’m depressed is even more helpful. Often, depression makes me feel lethargic. I have a difficult time of getting things done, and when I make should statements, I feel even more depressed because I often don’t follow through. I also tend to overeat when I’m depressed, and “shoulding” myself with, “I shouldn’t eat so many snacks or sweets” makes me feel worse when I don’t follow through.

Changing my “shoulds,” to “I choose,”  seems simple enough, and saying to myself, “I choose to clean the bathroom,” or, “I choose to only eat two small snacks a day,” improves my chances of getting those things done. 

Should and shouldn’t are also unhelpful when dealing with others. Thinking or saying, “she shouldn’t be so argumentative,” or, “he should spend more time with me,” can lead to feelings of frustration and powerlessness. Instead, you can identify the behavior and, depending on your relationship with the person, you can ignore the behavior or talk to that person in a productive way. Here’s where an “I feel” statement is helpful. 

Say you’re talking to a close friend. You feel like she hasn’t been spending enough time with you. Instead of saying, “You should spend more time with me,” you could say, “I feel like we’re not spending enough time together.” The first statement puts the problem on your friend, and the second statement is simply stating how you feel. Your friend is much more likely to respond in a positive way when she sees how you’re feeling rather than having you say your problem (you want to spend more time with her), is her problem (she should be spending more time with you).

Throughout your day, try getting rid of your should statements. When I work at this, I definitely feel better and more empowered. I'd love to hear from you. What's a "should" statement you could change to an "I choose" or "I feel" statement?

Thanks for reading.

Improving Our Mental Health: Emotional Reasoning

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

Emotional Reasoning is a common distortion that everyone deals with from time to time. An excellent article on emotional reading can be found on the Psychology Today website: "What is Emotional Reasoning and Why is It Such a Problem?"

The PsychCentral article, "15 Common Cognitive Distortions," says emotional reasoning:

can be summed up by the statement, “If I feel that way, it must be true.” Whatever a person is feeling is believed to be true automatically and unconditionally. If a person feels stupid and boring, then they must be stupid and boring.

Everyone does this. From your attributes as a person to your taste in restaurants, it's easy to believe that if you feel a certain way about something, it must be true. For example: if you feel like you're a boring person, you must be a boring person.

To combat this cognitive distortion, you can use facts. Let's take the boring person example. Say you feel like a boring person. As a result, you avoid social interactions because you feel like you'll just bore people. You ignore evidence to the contrary like the fact you have friends who want to spend time with you.

You also give yourself a feeling of helplessness when you think, "I am a boring person." Rather than consider things that may help you feel more confident in social situations like learning how to ask people questions, sharing things about your hobbies or interests, or talking about things you are knowledgeable about, you instead avoid social interactions altogether because you feel like you are boring.

You can apply using facts and solutions to all kinds of emotional reasoning. What facts might contradict how you feel about something? What are some solutions you could apply to change your negative feelings?

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health: Fortune Telling

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

One the distortions I deal with is Fortune Telling. The PositivePsychologyProgram website defines the Jumping to Conclusions: Fortune Telling distortion as:

A sister distortion to mind reading, fortune telling refers to the tendency to make conclusions and predictions based on little to no evidence and holding them as gospel truth. One example of fortune-telling is a young, single woman predicting that she will never find love or have a committed and happy relationship based only on the fact that she has not found it yet. There is simply no way for her to know how her life will turn out, but she sees this prediction as fact rather than one of several possible outcomes.

Fortune Telling has become less of a problem for me as I've dealt with bipolar longer, however, it still happens. When I was first dealing with mental illness, especially before being diagnosed, Fortune Telling really plagued me.

When I wasn't sleeping well, I would often tell myself that poor sleep was the norm. I would come to believe that I would never sleep well, and put that on top of already feeling tired, anxious, and often depressed, and that prediction that my sleep would always be poor became overwhelming.

Now, I've improved on avoiding fortune telling by taking things as they come. I've had enough experience with bipolar to know that episodes will happen and to tell myself during those episodes that they are not permanent.

While we all engage in fortune telling to some degree, it's important to take a step back when we start predicting the future--especially in a negative way. Living in the moment and making the best of a current situation is much more helpful than projecting into the future.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health - Jumping to Conclusions: Mind Reading

This post is part of a series of cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

The cognitive distortion of Jumping to Conclusions: Mind Reading involves telling oneself that she or he knows the thoughts of others. Mind Reading is defined on the PositivePsychologyProgram website as:

the inaccurate belief that we know what another person is thinking. Of course, it is possible to have an idea of what other people are thinking, but this distortion refers to the negative interpretations that we jump to. Seeing a stranger with an unpleasant expression and jumping to the conclusion that she is thinking something negative about you is an instance of this distortion.

I sometimes fall victim to this cognitive distortion, especially during or after a hypomanic or manic episode. During those times of increased energy and increased communication, I often believe that those I've communicated with are thinking of me in a negative way--especially after the manic or hypomanic episode has ended.

With this cognitive distortion it is helpful to remember that no one can truly know what another person is thinking. I work to combat this cognitive distortion by telling myself that people have better things to do than think about me. People are generally into their own lives, and they don't spend nearly as much time as we think thinking about other people. 

Besides, mind reading other people's thoughts and emotions is a waste of time. And, if I'm really concerned about what a friend or family member is thinking about me, I can ask that person rather than worry about it.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health: Disqualifying the Positive

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

In my last post on cognitive distortions, I wrote about the mental filter distortion and how to combat it. Similar to the mental filter disorder is disqualifying the positive. The PositivePsychologyProgram website defines disqualifying the positive as:

.... [acknowledging] positive experiences but reject[ing] them instead of embracing them. For example, a person who receives a positive review at work might reject the idea that he is a competent employee and attribute the positive review to political correctness or to his boss simply not wanting to talk about his employee’s performance problems. This is an especially malignant distortion since it can facilitate the continuance of negative thought patterns even in the face of lots of evidence to the contrary.

Disqualifying the positive is an easy trap to fall into. Instead of attributing a positive event or experience to one's own behavior, it is instead easy to attribute it to something out of one's control. For example: A friend tells you they appreciate something you said or did for her. Disqualifying the positive would mean you tell yourself she just said something positive to you to be nice and that she didn't really mean it.

Though I deal with this distortion at times, I've learned to combat it by taking positive feedback to heart. Instead of believing that I received a good review or acknowledgement at work simply because of my friendly and outgoing personality, I've tried instead to think about what I could have done at work to receive that positive feedback.

If you're like me, this distortion can be a tough one to catch. Remember: if you have something positive happen to you, don't automatically assume that what happened was out of your control or happened by chance. Take ownership of your positive experiences. Feel good about what you accomplished. Always diminishing or dismissing positive events can lead to depression, anxiety, or cynicism. 

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health - Mental Filter

This post is part of a series about cognitive distortions I've dealt with and how changing them helps improve my mental health. Of the sixteen most common cognitive distortions (read: Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You to see all sixteen), I'll be writing on the handful of distortions that have been most helpful for me to tackle.

One distortion that I've often succumbed to is Mental Filter. In this distortion, positive experiences are discounted and emphasis is placed on the negative. When I fall victim to this distortion, rather than seeing positive aspects of situations, instead I look only at the negative, then base my judgment on negative aspects of the situations. The PositivePsychologyProgram website defines the Mental Filter distortion as:

[focusing] on a single negative and exclud[ing] all the positive. An example of this distortion is one partner in a romantic relationship dwelling on a single negative comment made by the other partner and viewing the relationship as hopelessly lost, while ignoring the years of positive comments and experiences. The mental filter can foster a negative view of everything around you by focusing only on the negative.

This cognitive distortion particularly effects me when thinking about my pasts jobs. In those past jobs, I had periods where I was not doing a great job, mainly due to depression. I didn't get as much done and didn't do as well as I could have. As a result I sometimes see myself as a failure in those jobs.

It is helpful to combat this cognitive distortion by taking a more balanced view of situations. I can look at some of my past jobs and think, I didn't do a great job at all times, but there were certain times and certain aspects of my job that I did well. Instead of looking at a past job as a complete failure, instead I can look at it as a learning experience by which I can build on the things I did well and improve in areas I did not do well.

Combating a Mental Filter can be especially helpful in coping with and preventing negative emotions. Rather than looking at things where the positive is filtered out by the negative, one can gain a more balanced and positive perspective by taking a more nuanced view.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health - Our Thoughts and Moods

Our thoughts create all of our moods.

- David Burns

David Burns is a psychiatrist who has identified cognitive distortions and countering the cognitive distortions as part of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Burns was a practicing psychiatrist who did research on chemical imbalances of the brain as the culprit of depression and anxiety disorders. What he came to believe, however, was that there was not a strong link between brain chemistry and depression and anxiety. Also, he had been prescribing anti-depressants to his patients, but wasn’t seeing an improvement in most of them.

So, David Burns looked for another way. If you watch the video below, you can see what led Burns to this new approach, but suffice to say, Burns began practicing and developing CBT.

Burns developed ten cognitive distortions, and other distortions have since been added to CBT. Here are sixteen distortions and a brief description of each from, “Cognitive Distortions: When Your Brain Lies to You,” on the PositivePsychologyProgram website:

1. All-or-Nothing Thinking / Polarized Thinking

Also known as “Black-and-White Thinking,” this distortion manifests as an inability or unwillingness to see shades of gray. In other words, you see things in terms of extremes – something is either fantastic or awful, you are either perfect or a total failure.

2. Overgeneralization

This sneaky distortion takes one instance or example and generalizes it to an overall pattern. For example, a student may receive a C on one test and conclude that she is stupid and a failure. Overgeneralizing can lead to overly negative thoughts about oneself and one’s environment based on only one or two experiences.

3. Mental Filter

Similar to overgeneralization, the mental filter distortion focuses on a single negative and excludes all the positive. An example of this distortion is one partner in a romantic relationship dwelling on a single negative comment made by the other partner and viewing the relationship as hopelessly lost, while ignoring the years of positive comments and experiences. The mental filter can foster a negative view of everything around you by focusing only on the negative.

4. Disqualifying the Positive

On the flipside, the “Disqualifying the Positive” distortion acknowledges positive experiences but rejects them instead of embracing them. For example, a person who receives a positive review at work might reject the idea that he is a competent employee and attribute the positive review to political correctness or to his boss simply not wanting to talk about his employee’s performance problems. This is an especially malignant distortion since it can facilitate the continuance of negative thought patterns even in the face of lots of evidence to the contrary.

5. Jumping to Conclusions – Mind Reading

This “Jumping to Conclusions” distortion manifests as the inaccurate belief that we know what another person is thinking. Of course, it is possible to have an idea of what other people are thinking, but this distortion refers to the negative interpretations that we jump to. Seeing a stranger with an unpleasant expression and jumping to the conclusion that she is thinking something negative about you is an instance of this distortion.

6. Jumping to Conclusions – Fortune Telling

A sister distortion to mind reading, fortune telling refers to the tendency to make conclusions and predictions based on little to no evidence and holding them as gospel truth. One example of fortune-telling is a young, single woman predicting that she will never find love or have a committed and happy relationship based only on the fact that she has not found it yet. There is simply no way for her to know how her life will turn out, but she sees this prediction as fact rather than one of several possible outcomes.

7. Magnification (Catastrophizing) or Minimization

Also known as the “Binocular Trick” for its stealthy skewing of your perspective, this distortion involves exaggerating the importance or meaning of things or minimizing the importance or meaning of things. An athlete who is generally a good player but makes a mistake may magnify the importance of that mistake and believe that he is a terrible teammate, while an athlete who wins a coveted award in her sport may minimize the importance of the award and continue believing that she is only a mediocre player.

8. Emotional Reasoning

This may be one of the most surprising distortions to many readers, and it is also one of the most important to identify and address. The logic behind this distortion is not surprising to most people; rather, it is the realization that virtually all of us have bought into this distortion at one time or another. Emotional reasoning refers to the acceptance of one’s emotions as fact. It can be described as “I feel it, therefore it must be true.” Of course, we know this isn’t a reasonable belief, but it is a common one nonetheless.

9. Should Statements

Another particularly damaging distortion is the tendency to make “should” statements. Should statements are statements that you make to yourself about what you “should” do, what you “ought” to do, or what you “must” do. They can also be applied to others, imposing a set of expectations that will likely not be met. When we hang on too tightly to our “should” statements about ourselves, the result is often guilt that we cannot live up to them. When he cling to our “should” statements about others, we are generally disappointed by the failure of the others to meet our expectations, leading to anger and resentment.

10. Labeling and Mislabeling

These tendencies are basically extreme forms of overgeneralization, in which we assign judgments of value to ourselves or to others based on one instance or experience. For example, a student who labels herself as “an utter fool” for failing an assignment is engaging in this distortion, as is the waiter who labels a customer “a grumpy old miser” if he fails to thank the waiter for bringing his food. Mislabeling refers to the application of highly emotional, loaded language when labeling.

11. Personalization

As the name implies, this distortion involves taking everything personally or assigning blame to yourself for no logical reason to believe you are to blame. This distortion covers a wide range of situations, from assuming you are the reason a friend did not enjoy the girl’s night out because of you, to the more severe examples of believing that you are the cause for every instance of moodiness or irritation in those around you.

In addition to these basic cognitive distortions, Beck and Burns have mentioned a few others (Beck, 1976; Burns, 1980):

12. Control Fallacies

A control fallacy manifests as one of two beliefs: (1) that we have no control over our lives and are helpless victims of fate, or (2) that we are in complete control of ourselves and our surroundings, giving us responsibility for the feelings of those around us. Both beliefs are damaging, and both are equally inaccurate. No one is in complete control of what happens to them, and no one has absolutely no control over their situation. Even in extreme situations where an individual seemingly has no choices in what they do, where they go, or what they say, they still have a certain amount of control over how they approach their situation mentally.

13. Fallacy of Fairness

While we would all probably prefer to operate in a world that is fair, this assumption is not based in reality and can foster negative feelings when we are faced with proof of life’s unfairness. A person who judges every experience by its perceived fairness has fallen for this fallacy, and will likely feel anger, resentment, and hopelessness when he inevitably encounters a situation that is not fair.

14. Fallacy of Change

Another fallacy distortion involves expecting others to change if we pressure or encourage them enough. This distortion is usually accompanied by a belief that our happiness and success rests on other people, leading us to believe that forcing those around us to change is the only way to get what we want. A man who thinks “If I just encourage my wife to stop doing the things that irritate me, I can be a better husband and a happier person” is exhibiting the fallacy of change.

15. Always Being Right

Perfectionists and those struggling with Imposter Syndrome will recognize this distortion – it is the belief that we must always be right, correct, or accurate. With this distortion, the idea that we could be wrong is absolutely unacceptable, and we will fight to the metaphorical death to prove that we are right. For example, the internet commenters who spend hours arguing with each other over an opinion or political issue far beyond the point where reasonable individuals would conclude that they should “agree to disagree” are engaging in the “Always Being Right” distortion. To them, it is not simply a matter of a difference of opinion, it is an intellectual battle that must be won at all costs.

16. Heaven’s Reward Fallacy

This distortion is a popular one, particularly with the myriad examples of this fallacy playing out on big and small screens across the world. The “Heaven’s Reward Fallacy” manifests as a belief that one’s struggles, one’s suffering, and one’s hard work will result in a just reward. It is obvious why this type of thinking is a distortion – how many examples can you think of, just within the realm of your personal acquaintances, where hard work and sacrifice did not pay off? Sometimes no matter how hard we work or how much we sacrifice, we will not achieve what we hope to achieve. To think otherwise is a potentially damaging pattern of thought that can result in disappointment, frustration, anger, and even depression when the awaited reward does not materialize.

As you can see, there is a wide variety of cognitive distortions. Even those without mental illness can be well-served by identifying these distortions and correcting them to improve their mental health. In an upcoming series of posts, I'll write about how I've benefited from identifying and changing cognitive distortions. I won't write about every one--I'll focus on the ones that have been most helpful to me. I hope my experiences will be helpful for others to improve their mental health whether they suffer from a mental illness or not.

Thanks for reading.

End-of-the-Year and Goals Update

One of my goals this year was to write 52 blog posts by the end of the year. I'm 12 posts from meeting that goal, which means I need to average one-and-a-third posts per week to meet that goal.I think I can do it, but I'm going to forgo having all the posts proofread by my lovely and busy wife to keep cranking these posts out until the end of the year.

Here are my other goals for the year and their updates:

Average two days per week doing strength/cross training for my glutes/core/etc.
I didn't really keep track of this, but I did 2 - 3 days a week from January to March and at least 2 days a week most weeks after that. I'm going to say I met this one if I complete 2 - 3 days a week for the rest of the year.

Submit two stories to Runner's World
Done. Both will most likely be rejected.

Set a PR in the 50K
Not happening. Injuries kept me from running either of the two 50Ks I was considering.

Complete a 50 mile race
Same situation with injuries.

Break 17 minutes in the 5K
For some reason I just could not get my 5K speed up. I probably didn't run enough mileage and the early season injuries definitely didn't help.

It's hard to believe the end of the year is only a couple months away. Thankfully this year my goals went a little better than some previous years.

Run well.

Bipolar - Blessed

Many people, around one in twenty-five in the United States, suffer from a mental illness in a given year. Being diagnosed with bipolar I, I will likely deal with mental illness every year for the rest of my life.

It's easy to get down and to feel depressed, angry, or helpless when I think about my illness affecting me from now until the foreseeable future. One thing that’s helped me is counting my blessings. I've been blessed with a family and friends support system that has made it immensely easier to go through the highs and lows of bipolar.

When I've been manic, my friends and family have been understanding of my increased communication, pressured speech, and doing and saying things I wouldn’t say or do when I’m not having a manic or hypomanic episode.

I also have a wife that’s patient and helpful to me when I’m feeling depressed. When I’m feeling down, everything seems like more of an effort—chores, hanging out with others, getting myself ready—at times when I’m depressed it takes willpower to do things that would normally be routine. When I’m feeling that way, Laura often takes on extra chores and is sympathetic and understanding.

Also, I have friends and family that read my blog and sometimes say an encouraging word or two. Though it may not seem like much, occasionally hearing that something I’ve written has affected someone’s life in a positive way really makes me feel good.

When I shifting this blog from writing more about mental health than about running, I really hoped to raise more awareness about mental illness and especially to give people tools to cope with mental illness and/or support those dealing with mental illness. Hearing from people who have found those posts helpful really makes it feel worthwhile writing this blog.

In my next few posts, I’ll be sharing some skills I’ve learned to help me cope with mental illness. Again, I’m hoping that sharing my experiences will be helpful not only to those with mental illness and their friends and family, but also for those who are looking to improve their mental health in general.

Thanks for reading.

Improving Mental Health: DBT and CBT

Since 2012, when I first missed a significant portion of work and eventually resigned my teaching position, partially due to symptoms of bipolar, I’ve regularly seen a therapist. The three types of therapy I’ve used have been CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), DBT (Dialectical Behavorial Therapy), and Narrative Therapy. CBT is one of the most practiced forms of therapy, and DBT is considered a branch of CBT. You can read about the differences and similarities in “What’s the difference between CBT and DBT?” on the PsychCentral website. Narrative Therapy has some similarities to both DBT and CBT, and it is helpful for many. DBT has been the most helpful for me, so I’ll spend a few posts writing about some of its elements.

In 2015, after I was hospitalized for a mixed state (depression and hypomania), I did an eight week DBT skills group. These skills have especially helped me manage depression and anxiety, but several are also helpful for managing manic episodes. During this group therapy, one of the other participants said, “Everyone should learn this,” and the other people in the group agreed. So, whether you have a mental illness or not, I think you’ll find some of the information on DBT helpful.

The four components of DBT are:

• Mindfulness
• Interpersonal Effectiveness
• Distress Tolerance
• Emotional Regulation

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy involves identifying and changing cognitive distortions including:

• All or Nothing Thinking
• Overgeneralization
• Mental Filters
• Discounting the positive
• Jumping to Conclusions
• Magnification
• Emotional Reasoning
• Should Statements

Since there is a ton of information about DBT and CBT on the internet, so I'll focus on things that have worked well for me and provide resources if you're interested in going more in-depth. Good places to start learning about DBT and CBT are, "An Overview of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy," from the PsychCentral website and "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy" from the SimplyPsychology website.

Some helpful resources for DBT and CBT include:

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook by: Matthew McKay, Jeffrey C. Wood, and Jeffrey Brantley

The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns

Thanks for reading!

Hospital Anniversary

About two years ago, I was hospitalized around this date. Early to mid fall is difficult most years, but this year seems to be the exception. I've got a lot of things going for me this year, and I know, knock on wood, that I'm not going to end up in the hospital.

I had another hospital stay two years ago as of this coming February, so it's not the two year anniversary of staying out of the hospital yet, but with the way things are going I'm feeling confident that I'll be able to avoid the hospital in February as well.

Other than being very tired in the mornings, my mood has been excellent. One of the biggest things that indicate that bipolar symptoms are going to be a problem is poor sleep. At first, I thought poor sleep precipitated hypomanic, manic, or depressive episodes, but after talking to my nurse practitioner, she said she thought it was the other way around. My sleep has been good (other than sleeping more than I'd like--more about that later--and I've been falling asleep and staying asleep easily.

I was actually relieving to hear that my manic or hypomanic episodes were causing poor sleep and not the other way around. Instead of stressing about sleep, which often made it harder to fall asleep, I've learned to roll with in and rather than telling myself I needed to get eight hours of sleep every night to recover, I just tell myself I'm going to sleep less and focus on managing the hypomanic symptoms instead of worrying about sleep.

Good sleep generally means I'm not in or going to have a manic, hypomanic, or depressive state, so I'm hoping that continues. Part of why I've been sleeping well has been a medication adjustment which has really worked well. The big downsides of the medication are a insatiable appetite and making it very hard to get out of bed in the morning.

I'm feeling grateful for all the support I've received to be free from bipolar symptoms. It's been very satisfying to make it through the early fall feeling good, and I'm optimistic that I'll make it beyond the two year mark of hospital stays.

Running Update

I haven’t written a post about running a long time—I apologize to the readers who mainly come here for the running posts. If you’re still with me, thanks for being patient through all the mental health posts. If you’re someone who reads more for mental health and life updates and aren’t interested in posts about training, go ahead and skip this one.

Running had finally been going well up until this past Wednesday when I had a sharp pain in my foot and ended up having to walk two-and-a-half miles to get back home. Unlike the injuries that had nagged me for months before I had them looked at, I had my foot looked at right away. The doctor took some x-rays and poked around on my foot. She said it could just be some joint pain and that it might go away if I took a couple days off. If it hurts again when I run, I’m supposed to go get an MRI.

Before the foot started hurting, I had got my weekly mileage up over fifty, and if this foot thing is just a little blip, I’m hoping to go back to that mileage in the next few weeks.

I have no scheduled races this year besides pacing a Halloween half marathon. I’m going to miss out on my goals of running a 50 mile race and setting a PR in the 50K. I was too injured to race the 50K I was planning on running in July and had to do the 25K instead.  The first 50 mile I was thinking of was also not feasible due to my injuries. The fall races where I could try and PR at the 50K or complete a 50 mile happen to fall over my cousin’s wedding weekend in Texas.

So, the 50 mile and the 50K goals aren’t happening. That leaves breaking 17 minutes in the 5K. I still have a shot at this one, but it’s going to be really tough. I’ve got to continue building my mileage if I want to have a shot, and that means being efficient with my time and continuing to do injury prevention exercises to stay healthy. Right now my long runs and tempo runs are going great, but my shorter intervals are not. I can tell I’m still a ways off from being able to hold a sub-5:30 pace for a 5K, so I’ve got some work to do before I break 17:00.

I’m using a plan based on a Matt Fitzgerald book, “Run - The Mind Body Method of Running by Feel,” and an article in the now-defunct magazine, “Running Times” called “Always Ready to Race.” Basically, I’ve created a no-plan-plan where I decide on an interval workout during the week and then a long run and a tempo run on the weekend. 

Here are some nuts and bolts as to how I’m structuring my training:

I’m taking off either Monday, Tuesday, or both, or going very easy one of those days. This is mainly because I’m home with Calvin those and there’s not always time to run before or after Laura’s at work, but it’s also to recover from the increased mileage I’ve been doing on the weekends.

Wednesday is an interval/fartlek workout. I’ve done by time, for example 1:00 hard, 1:00 easy, 2:00 hard/easy, 3:00 hard/easy and repeat one or two times. I’ve also done 0.5 miles hard, 0.75 miles hard, 1 mile hard with 2 - 3 minute recovery and repeat once. As I’ve said before, I’m not hitting very many of these intervals at my goal 5K pace, but I’m starting to feel like with increased mileage I’m going to get there.

Thursday and Friday I’ve been doing easier runs of 5 - 9 miles before doing my weekend’s workouts. 

The back-to-back tempo and long run is something new I’ve decided to try, and over the past few weeks it’s been going well. I listened to an interview with famed coach Jack Daniels a few years back where he talked about bunching your training when you have more time over the weekend. So, I’m been doing a long run followed by a longish tempo run, or vice versa, on the weekends.

At first I wondered how I would hold up, and for now my legs have felt good. A couple weekends ago I put in 14 miles on Saturday and then did an 11 mile progression/tempo run on Sunday. I actually meant to do 10 miles on Sunday, but the water fountain I was running to was half-a-mile farther than I thought.

All-in-all, I’m feeling a little better about my training than I was a few weeks ago. I ran a 17:46 at a 5K about a month back—well short of 17 minutes and the first time I broke 18 minutes all season. Since then, however, my mileage has increased, and with the increase of mileage my old injuries haven’t flared up. I’ll be racing a 5K in the next few weeks, so we’ll see how much time I can shave off that 17:46.

Run well.

September Sugar Challenge

If you missed my previous post on the September Sugar Challenge, you’re not too late. You can still join for the second half of the month. I didn’t get near the response I got when I invited my readers to try the August Sugar Challenge a couple of years back. If you want to join, it’s easy. You can read the whole post, September Sugar Challenge, but here are some things you can do to participate:

• Give up one high sugar item from your diet. I recommend a sugared beverage like a blended coffee (things like frappuccinos or lattes can be filled with sugar, often more than the daily recommended amount of sugar in one drink) or soda (most sodas have almost one-and-a-half-times the recommended amount of sugar in a 12 oz serving)..
• Limit yourself to one sweet a day, one a week, etc.
• Eliminate (within reason) processed sugar from your diet. I wouldn’t go all the way with this one. Bread, granola, some sauces, etc. often have some sugar in them. Instead, focus on sweetened cereals, beverages, etc., and try to limit things with added sugar to less than 10 grams or so.

That’s it. If you’re interested in participating, leave a comment and let us know what you’re up to.

I had decided on three sweets a week and to keep those sweets to a reasonable portion size for the first half of the month. Now, I am going to one sweet a week for the second half of the month.

Thanks for reading.

September Sugar Challenge

This blog post is kind of a re-run from a couple years back, but I thought with school starting, it might be a good time to try to maintain or start a sugar-reduction in our diets.

There's already plenty (too much) information on the internet about nutrition. The best I can say is to follow the advice of two of my favorite authors:

“Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.”
― Michael Pollan, " In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto"

"Balance your energy sources... if it ain't broke, don't fix it."
― Matt Fitzgerald, Runner's World Performance Nutrition for Runners

Sugar is a big problem in the U.S. Most of us get way more than the recommended amount. For woman, the recommended amount is fewer than 25 grams, and for men it's fewer than 38 grams. Consider that your average 12 oz soda has around 40 grams of sugar and your average medium frappuccino has 50 grams of sugar, and you can see how we consume WAY to much sugar from beverages alone.

So, how about a challenge? Pick your own:

Bronze:

• Pick one sugary food or drink to eliminate from your diet for the month of September. 

If you drink sugared soda, sugared coffee beverages, or even a sugary sports drink, I'd go for that. Sure, the sugar will give you some energy, but why waste precious sugar calories on a drink? I'd prefer some sort of a dessert to a soda, but to each their own.

Silver:

• Limit yourself to one sweet a day, week, every other day, or whatever. 

I've done this a number of times, and it works pretty well. When there are sweets in the staff room at work, I usually grab one. If I'm limiting my sweets, I have to ask myself, "do I really want to use my one sweet today (or this week, or whatever) on cupcakes from Target?"

Gold

• "Eliminate" processed sugar from your diet.

This one's tricky, as everything from ketchup to whole grain cereal has processed sugar. You can decide to go all out and eat only whole foods and/or cereals and processed foods with no added sugar, but that's a tall order.

What I'd recommend it set a limit on how much sugar can be in something for you to be "allowed" to eat it. Kashi Dark Cocoa Karma Wheat Biscuit Cereal has 9g of added sugar--I'd say that's a decent baseline.

You can set whatever limit you want and then be reasonable about your food choices. Make sure to check serving sizes, but don't go nuts--it's not worth driving yourself crazy. Does one piece of dark chocolate count as a sweet? It's up to you.

"Cheating" or, "Succumbing to temptation"

Don't beat yourself up--it happens. If you want to try the September Sugar Challenge but are worried you can't do it, try it anyway. And if you "cheat," keep going. Olympic athletes compete for the gold medal, but even when they know it's out of reach, they usually finish anyway. Watch any Olympic event, especially the marathon, for confirmation of this fact.

If you'd like to try this challenge, I'd love to hear from you. Comment on Facebook, Twitter, or on this post and let us know you're trying the challenge. 

I could expound on nutrition for runners, but this post is meant to be all-inclusive. There are countless iterations of diets out there from paleo to vegan, but the most sage advice involves a balanced diet of mostly plants (vegetables, fruits, legumes, nuts, and grains), and mostly whole foods. 

Balancing your energy sources means getting enough calories through carbohydrates, fat, and protein. It doesn't mean eliminating entire food groups--don't do that. But eliminating processed sugar? I don't see a problem with that.  

Anxiety, Mania, and Depression: The Advantages

In my previous posts about anxiety, mania, and depression, I wrote about the difficulties that go along with these various states. While symptoms of depression, bipolar, and anxiety can be debilitating at worst and make life difficult at best, there are certain advantages that come with my bipolar and generalized anxiety disorder.

While anxiety can make it difficult to impossible to perform at work, the right amount of anxiety can actually improve work performance. I've mentioned before in a Mental Health Myths and Facts post that according to an article in the Wall Street Journal (Anxiety Can Bring Out the Best), employees with anxiety often outperform their peers.

Why is this? In many people, anxiety means fretting about completing tasks in a quality way. It also means worrying about what people think and say about them. With these worries, people with anxiety may work hard to complete a task in a way that is high quality and pleasing to their peers and supervisors. As long as the anxiety is relatively under control, employees can perform well due to increased self-scrutiny of their work.

Being bipolar can also bring about advantages. There are books and articles devoted to the subject, ranging from correlating bipolar with creative, even genius thinking (I'm not going to claim I'm a genius, but I will say that when I'm in a hypomanic or manic state, if I can stay focused, I harness some creative thinking while problem-solving and working on writing projects).

My bipolar also helps me get things done that I wouldn't normally work on. When I'm manic, I often engage in cleaning that I wouldn’t do on my own volition. Things that wouldn't normally bother me do, and I'll spend time vacuuming, scrubbing, or organizing things. The key is staying focused so I don't have ten things in various states of completion going on at once.

Depression doesn't come with obvious advantages. I hate the lethargy, lack of motivation, and weight gain that often accompanies it. Depression does, however, bring some advantages. For me, the number one advantage is creating more empathy. When I'm feeling sad for no reason, one of my strategies is counting my blessings. While this does not usually help me snap out of a depressive phase, it does, at times, motivate me to try to help improve the lives of people who don't have all the social, financial, and material blessings I do.

Being in a depressive phase can also help me appreciate the times when I'm not depressed and provide perspective for the times when I'm feeling well. When I come out of a depressive phase, I often appreciate the contentment I have as compared to when I am depressed.

So, while the various symptoms of my generalized anxiety disorder and bipolar can make life difficult, there are definitely advantages and perspectives that have been helpful and enriched my life because of these illnesses.

Thanks for reading.

Depression

According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Adminstration (SAMHS), in 2016, 4.3% of adults experienced a major depressive episode that severely impaired their work or personal activities. However, even those whose activities are not severely impaired can still meet the criteria for major depression.  Here are some more statistics from SAMHS as cited on the National Institute of Mental Health (use the link for a better resolution on the graph) website:

If depression is something you or a family member struggle with, I hope this post is helpful.

In the three times I’ve been hospitalized for depression, the predominant feelings were worthlessness and anxiousness. I worried constantly about how I would get through the day. I felt anxious and guilty about my past. Mistakes I’d made, things I’d done wrong, and pasts slights or injuries done to me since I was a child bubbled into my consciousness to give me feelings of guilt, remorse, anger, and regret. I believed the world would be better off without me and that I was a burden to my loved ones.

With bipolar I, I tend to have depressive periods in winter and immediately after manic or hypomanic episodes. I also experience mixed states where the restlessness and energy of mania vacillates with the sadness and hopelessness of depression—sometimes within the same hour. Thankfully, most of my depressive episodes are short lived—usually a month or less. Within those given months, the severity of the depression varies. Some days I feel I can handle life’s tasks. Some days, I feel lethargic. Other days, sad and anxious. Still other days I feel emotionally numb.

In my next post, I'l write about some coping skills that have helped me with depression. 

Thanks for reading.

Ordinary Grace

So a while back, I said I’d be writing some posts about books I’ve listened to on the run. I’ve got several draft posts ready to go, but I’ve been wondering if my readers are even interested in posts about audiobooks.

"Ordinary Grace." It was amazing. While I don't usually listen to literary fiction while running, the mystery element of "Ordinary Grace" was compelling enough to keep the story moving and without getting too bogged down in prose.

The plot of the novel is pretty straightforward, so I really don't want to give anything away. The mystery is well-crafted and leaves the readers enough hints and misdirections to keep them guessing who-done-it.

Besides a well-crafted plot, setting and characterization are nearly flawless. The story takes place in southern Minnesota, and as a Minnesota resident who's spent some time in the area, I could completely picture the setting in my mind. For those who haven’t been to southern Minnesota, there is enough detail and description to make the novel come alive.

The characters in "Ordinary Grace" are interesting, well-rounded and believable. The novel is told from the viewpoint of an adult, but done as he looks back into his childhood. The first person narrative doesn't feel too narrow in describing the plot or the characters. As the novel moved on, I felt I was getting to know both the narrator and the supporting characters personally.

Reading this book made me search out more titles by Krueger, and I’ve really enjoyed listening to and reading his Cork O’Connor series.

If you’re interested in other posts about books, let me know. Otherwise, I’ll bag this idea.

Thanks for reading.